Friday, August 10, 2012

Phases


I’ve been trying to get my kids to enjoy Pink Floyd. Of course, it’s not going too well. Perhaps Ummagumma and Meddle are a bit too much for beginners. Ya think? Maybe I should save that for later on and start with the gateway Pink Floyd, such as The Wall, or Wish You Were Here. Something they could dance to…Animals.

Or perhaps expose them to more Phish.

I told them, right in the middle of “Several Species of Small Furry Animals Gathered Together in a Cave and Grooving with a Pict” that this was the music I was listening to while my fellow teens were grooving to the sweet sounds of New Kids on the Block, Tiffany, or Milli Vanilli. I was also experimenting with The Doors, The Sex Pistols, The Dead Milkmen, and The Beatles, just to name a few. Yeah kids, your dad was cool.

They try to get me to tune into the local Remixed Hits and Latest Crap station, and I balk, but eventually let them subject me to what they like. And I do it. I do it and like it. Not the music…but the way it makes them happy. But I still don’t get some of it. Bland, forced talented performers pleasing the populace is what I hear. No “speaking right to the core of my very soul” music or lyrics. Or at least none that I can hear or understand, no matter how loud they want it played.

Listen to me. I sound like I assume my dad would sound like, if he were here. (No, he’s still around, just not here.)

Ok, no lying here, but I liked some pretty crappy music myself when I was like, 12 and stuff. Ok, so maybe into the teens as well. But it was right before going to academy (that’s middle and high school for you heatherns) when I discovered real music. Even when I had headphones on, my grandma had a way of telling if I was listening to Mother Approved Country or if it was Taboo Rock and/or Roll. Speaking of headphones…I remember having a set of bright yellow radio headphones. You know…DJ style with the black insulating-yet-not-so-soundproof padding, complete with AM/FM and a telescoping antenna. She could tell the difference between my head bopping to Eddie Rabbitt’s “Drivin’ My Life Away” and Kiss’ “Lick It Up.” Frankie Goes to Hollywood, Culture Club, Yes, Blue Oyster Cult, The Cars and many, many more bands were added to my list of music that I had been missing for so long. I’d been missing them and never even realized it.

And music wasn’t the only media that was due for a change. It was around the same time that I stared expanding my reading beyond textbooks, Mad Magazine and the Time-Life Real Crime and Criminals Encyclopedia and started reading fiction, such as Stephen King. My grandma would ask me why in the world I wanted to read that kind of stuff. I think she was more appalled by the language than the horror that lay within. You know, I was already reading everything that I could get my hands on. I noticed that I couldn’t even ride by a sign without knowing what it said and reading it (aloud, sometimes). I also noticed that I couldn’t “not” read any words I saw. That’s why I was reading that kind of stuff. I kind of had no choice. I think that I had always liked reading. I was told that I went into 1st grade already reading some. I do remember reading a Scooby Doo reader and blabbering gibberish when I didn’t know what a word was. But there were lots of words that I did know. That is what I think shocked some folks.

And now for a real shocker: I like PBS’ Downton Abbey. I know it is just a British nighttime drama, close to being a full-blown soap opera. I can’t help it. It draws me in. Sometime this past year, I was on the phone with my grandma and I told her about the show and how much I followed the last season and that I thought it was really great. She said she knew what it was and had seen a few episodes of it herself. Then she said she was surprised to hear me say that I liked it. “I thought you liked horror and action or science fiction movies and books. That’s what you always liked growing up.”

Well, Mom, I still do.

My horizons were, shall we say, “expanded” during the early 90’s. And during the mid 90’s too. All the way up to the late 90’s if the truth be known. The expansion really started before that, but it was during that entire decade where I was able to open the doors and explore beyond the boundaries of anywhere I had ever been. I discovered who I was, what I liked beyond a doubt, and discovered artistic abilities I never knew I had.

Then I sobered up.

Just kidding. No, not really.

It is absolutely normal for people to change. It is also absolutely normal for people to stay the same. To me, and way up on the surface, I sure do feel like I hadn’t changed at all in such a long time. There are so many things that enjoyed as a teenager that I never really lost interest in. I love reading for the sake of reading, and it really doesn’t matter what it is. I love all sorts of music. And last time I checked, I still found women attractive. But of course there have been changes, different phases of my life. What I have become, what I am, what I will become…all culminate from the “me” of the past and pieced together with great big chunks from each phase of life. And I’m talking about all phases; the good along with the bad.

I wouldn’t trade any part of my past for anything.

I only wish I’d discovered Phish before I did…

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